


Beholder

by theunknownfate



Category: Watchmen - All Media Types
Genre: Blindness, First Time, Kink Meme, M/M, Prompt Fill, Sleep Sex, Touching
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-09
Updated: 2014-02-09
Packaged: 2018-01-11 16:38:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1175342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theunknownfate/pseuds/theunknownfate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for a kinkmeme prompt: Dan is temporarily blinded and has to learn Rorschach's face by touch. He declares some part of it beautiful.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

God, it burned! 

The punk had been just a kid, and clearly panicked. Nite Owl had tried to give him the chance to give up without lasting injury (an offer that had to look good considering what Rorschach was doing to the kid’s cohorts in the background). The kid had wilted and dropped what looked like a pipe bomb from his hand. The half-second Nite Owl spent processing that had let the kid swing at his head with the canister in his other hand. It shattered as it broke his goggle lenses. Whatever was in it splashed into both Nite Owl’s eyes, even as he lashed out with a kick. He felt it connect, felt the ribs give under his boot, though all he saw was a burst of red. 

He had ripped off what was left of the goggles to claw at his own eyes. Painful bursts of red static exploded in what remained of his vision when he touched them, then faded to black. He couldn’t even tell if they were open or not, so he frantically pulled his gloves off to press his fingers into his streaming eyes. There weren’t any more bursts of any color, but the pain seemed to seeping into his head, straight to his brain from his eye sockets, like acid, like beestings, like rattlesnake venom. It stung and burned and it was entirely too easy to imagine that the hot wetness on his cheeks were his dissolved eyeballs instead of tears.

A high-pitched ‘nngh!’ whispered out of him and he forced himself not to rub. God only knew what the chemical had been. Basic first aid from grade school started repeating in his head. _Don’t rub, just let the tears flush it out. Don’t rub. Don’t rub. Cry it out. Don’t rub. Don’t rub_. He wasn’t able to keep from pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes and the next sound he made was a desperate whine. 

It hurt badly enough that he had forgotten about the fight still going on until a punch to the gut doubled him over. New panic touched him. He was blind and unmasked and a second punch sank into his ribs. It was reflex that threw his elbow out and deflected the next strike, but a kick knocked him backwards. He hit the wall of the tenement behind him, lost his footing, and fell. He forced his eyes open wide, willing them to see _something_. Nothing. Not even red. The blood was pounding so loudly in his ears that he couldn’t hear if someone was coming, couldn’t tell what was happening. 

A grip fell on his shoulder and he threw an arm out to fight back as best he could. His bare hand clutched at something that felt like latex. Whatever it was froze, and he felt a warm, startled exhale against his palm. Realization sank through his panic. He heard his own name through the roaring in his ears and gasped in relief.

“Rorschach,” he said, then sputtered. “I can’t see. _I can’t see!_ It got in my eyes! I-”

“Stop.” The voice was as gruff as ever, but there was an undercurrent of uncertainty there that didn‘t help. “Let go of my face.” Nite Owl’s first impulse was to clutch him even tighter. If Rorschach moved out of his reach, he wouldn’t be able to find him. He’d be _alone_ like this. Helpless. Utterly. 

“Nite Owl…” There was a warning there, the growl rumbling against his palm, and he let go enough to slide the hand down to grab the trench coat collar. His other hand swayed in the air until it connected with an arm and grabbed on. There was a grunt, but Rorschach didn’t slap him away. Dan felt gloved hands touch his face and tried not to flinch as thumbs pulled one of his eyes open wide. The night air felt cool against his eyeball, but didn’t affect the burning that seemed to be swirling around inside the socket. 

“Red,” Rorschach said more softly. “Blood vessels in eye may have burst.” 

“It burns!” It was harder than Dan thought to steady his own voice. He wanted to scream and thrash. “I can’t see a thing,” he added miserably. “I can feel it spreading!” He could also feel Rorschach’s pulse against his thumb, and it was almost as fast as his own. 

“Incendiaries, chemicals, handmade explosives,” Rorschach rumbled, checking the other eye. His hands were shaking, probably with wrath. “Drug dealers turned terrorists.”

Rorschach’s thumb pressed in experimentally and Dan gasped as pain stabbed through his eye from ear to sinus. Someone cursed loudly and he couldn’t even be embarrassed when he realized that it had been him. Rorschach made a sound that could almost be chagrined. 

“Bleeding now,” he said. “Sorry.”

“My eyes are bleeding??” Dan jerked, hauling Rorschach closer. Keeping his fingers dug into Rorschach’s coat kept him from digging them into his eyes. “You have to take me to a hospital.” 

“Can’t,” Rorschach said. “Homemade accelerant on face. Scum using same substance to make bombs. Will cause suspicion. Be implicated in future incidents. Unwanted attention. Undeserved. Compromise identity.”

“You would rather I was blind??” Dan was losing the fight against hysteria. “Rorschach, it‘s _in my eyes_!! It _BURNS_!!!” 

“Daniel…” Rorschach’s voice had dropped to a whisper, and it was the last thing that made it through the haze of his pain before a carefully aimed punch sent his consciousness into darkness as well.


	2. Chapter 2

There wasn‘t time to get Daniel home before the damage was done. Getting him into Archie took entirely too long. Daniel was strapping to say the least, and even unconscious, he groaned and tried to claw at his eyes. Rorschach used the cooled water from the coffee pot to pour over Dan’s eyes, prying the eyelids up and splashing them as clean as he could until the water supply ran out. He debated using the water from Archie’s cooling tanks, but decided he wasn’t positive it was just water in there. He tangled Dan’s hands in his cape to keep them off his eyes and took them home as quickly as possible.

Wrestling Daniel, cape and all, over his own kitchen sink was a mess, but the spray nozzle was the best tool Rorschach could think of. Daniel’s face was getting blotches, as if the chemical had burned his skin like it had his eyes. Rorschach kept the water warm, thinking that cold would make Daniel revive faster, and he wanted his partner spared as much pain as possible. He kept it up until the water went cold anyway and he began to worry that the pressure of water sprayed on the eyeball might be doing as much damage as the chemical had. 

He turned the water off and took a step back to breath a moment before deciding what to do next. A grip on his coat stopped him and he realized that Daniel’s fist was clenched around the front of his coat. The sightless open eyes were as splattered with red as his face, staring blankly, which made his owns fists tighten. 

“Awake?” Rorschach asked, hesitating to touch him again. 

“Maybe.” Dan sounded dazed. “Where are we?” Rorschach twitched with surprise before accepting that most people wouldn’t recognize their own kitchen if all they had to go by was the edge of the sink against their face. 

“Home,” he said, then quickly added. “Yours.”

“Still can’t see.” Dan squirmed, trying to get up. His grip on the coat didn’t let up and he held out his other hand. Rorschach didn’t move to take it, but didn’t step away when it clutched his shoulder either. “I… feel sick…”

“Possibly poisoned.”

“You’re just a ray of sunshine, aren’t you?” Dan raised his head and then spasmed. “Grah! Oh! God!”

“Daniel…”

“I can feel it sloshing around in my head!” He let go of Rorschach to clutch at his face. His voice broke, going a little higher. “God, it burns!” He doubled over, gasping, then retched. His eyes were on fire, the inside of his nose felt like it was full of needles, and a taste like the smell of oven cleaner rose in his mouth before he vomited all over himself. The roaring was back in his ears, so it was a little while before he realized Rorschach was speaking to him.

“-best to purge now. Get contaminant out. Heal faster.” There was a pause where he felt hands moving around his shoulders, lowering him to his knees on the floor. “You…” Another pause and the hands on him almost squeezed. “Will be all right, Daniel. Not alone.”

Dan wanted to say something grateful, but threw up again as soon as he pulled in a breath to speak. He felt the vomit splash over his knees and it seemed searing hot. He felt like he had spewed all the strength he had out over his linoleum. The temptation to just sink down into the puddle and sleep there until he felt better made itself known, and he might have if the grip on his shoulders hadn’t held him up. The stink of the vomit made it through the prickling heat in his nostrils and he winced.

“I’m sorry,” he said, too drained to be ashamed yet, but he was pretty sure he would be later. He couldn’t even hold his head up. It slumped forward and he could feel something pooling against the inside of his forehead and behind his eyes. 

“Blink,” Rorschach said. Dan tilted his head in confusion, thinking he had missed part of a sentence again. Gloved thumbs ghosted over his face and closed his eyes as if he was a corpse. “Haven’t blinked. Let eyes rest.”

The glove leather was damp from the sink, cool and gentle enough that no fireworks of pain flared under the touch. Then it was gone and he could feel them tugging at his cape and the fasteners on his armor. 

“Get this off,” Rorschach muttered. “Get clean. Rest. Heal. Be fine soon.”

Dan tried to help, but weakness made him clumsy and he couldn’t see to stay out of Rorschach’s way. They kept getting tangled. Cool air washed over him as piece by piece the suit fell away. He wished he could get that cool sensation on the inside. 

Rorschach’s arm wrapped around him, heaving him up again. They stumbled and staggered through the house, up the stairs, and into the bathroom. Dan stubbed his toe with a loud crack on the edge of the tub and gasped. He and Rorschach apologized in the same breath. 

“Not your fault,” Rorschach said after an awkward pause. “Can’t see.” 

“Only because I was stupid.” Dan sighed. “Let the bomb distract me and got hit in the face.” He kept a tight hold on Rorschach even as he was maneuvered into the shower. “I’m…sorry to grab. I don’t want to fall.”

The only answer was a throaty ‘hnnh’, and then the water was turned on.

Dan heard the pipes come to life a second before the water hit so he didn’t jump. It was surreal to have water rushing over him while he was in pitch darkness. It was cooler than he expected, but pleasant on his face, which felt sunburned. He leaned against the wall when he felt himself sway. The water coming out of his hair smelled sharp. He decided it must be traces of the chemical that had seeped under his cowl and made sure his eyes and mouth were closed tight. A hand touched his back and he flinched, partly at surprise that there was no glove on it, and partly because of a new stab of pain. He dimly remembered being hit after being blinded. More bruised ribs from the feel of it.

The hand slid up to his shoulder, rested a moment there, then moved to tilt his chin slightly downward. Dan was surprised at the contact, but grateful. If he could feel Rorschach, he would know where he was. 

“Blisters,” Rorschach said. “ Maybe not accelerant. Possibly part of the bomb. Explosion that spreads acid instead of shrapnel, maybe?”

“Acid,” Dan repeated. “In my eyes. My God.”

“Didn’t mean to alarm you.”

“I’m afraid of being blind, Rorschach.” Dan no longer had the energy to panic. “How long before you’ll take me to a doctor? I suppose I can feel my way to a phone and call 911 eventually…”

“No need,” Rorschach said. He sounded a bit subdued too. “Will call myself if there’s no improvement. Tell them something. That you were maced by muggers.”

“You could tell them that now!” 

“Eyes are red, but intact. Probably blood that’s blocking vision.” 

“Is it entertaining to see me like this? Why are you stalling?”

“….”

“Well? If it was your eyes melting wouldn’t you want help?”

“Am helping.” That was said so quietly that Dan fumbled for the faucet to turn the water off to hear better. “If it was me, would rather have you help me than doctors.”

“Rorschach…” Dan couldn’t help but feel a jab of emotion with his other pains. 

“Hospital might be safe for you,” Rorschach admitted. “Respectable. Have money. But no family to miss you. Homeless disappear after being admitted sometimes. Maybe disposed of for organs. Don’t know yet. Don’t trust them.” There was a long pause where Dan stood there dripping. “I would have to go with you. Might not try anything if they think you aren‘t alone.“

“Rorschach…“ Dan began again, but was interrupted.

“Wait til tonight? Just to be sure no connections made to terrorists?”

“Fine,” Dan said, even though he had no idea what time it was. His head went back to the wall. “Will you hand me a towel?”  
A glass of water to clean out his throat made Dan throw up again before they left the bathroom. The second glass he tried at Rorschach’s insistence stayed down, but Dan still felt wobbly and weak. He clung to Rorschach all the way to his room. His eyes still burned and fighting the urge to rub them made his breathing erratic. Rorschach set him on the edge of the bed and grunted when he didn’t let go. 

“Can let go now,” he said, some surliness creeping back into his voice. 

“No,” Dan said, barely audible. “I’ll fall.”

“Sitting now, Daniel. Nowhere to fall to.”

“Can’t.” Dan said, leaning forward to rest his forehead on Rorschach’s stomach which made the smaller man go rigid. The smell of old blood and street grime and unwashed vigilante struck him as pleasantly organic after the chemical burn and vomit in his nose. “If I let go, my hands will yank my eyes out. Have to hang on to something.”

Rorschach was quiet, then his hands came back to Dan’s shoulders and pushed him back. He took Dan’s wrists and gently pried his hands off his coat. Before Dan could protest, he felt a capsule touch his lips. 

“From your medicine cabinet,” Rorschach said. “From when you broke your arm. So you can sleep. I won’t leave.” he added more quickly. “Keep watch so you don’t. Scratch. At eyes.”

“All right,” Dan said. “I trust you.” 

The painkillers kept Dan out for most of the day. Rorschach tucked him in tightly with his arms under the sheets and true to his word, sat by his side to make sure he didn’t work a hand free to touch his eyes. He was already planning how he would go about getting Dan to the hospital if he still couldn’t see when he woke up. 

_Would have to change clothes… maybe borrow some of Daniel’s… have to leave face behind. Wouldn’t matter. Daniel wouldn’t see him, being blind. Get Daniel dressed, take him out somewhere on the street. Call ambulance from a pay phone maybe. Tell them he was Daniel’s… what? Brother? No, looked nothing alike. Roommate? Could be assumed they were homosexual. Galling. And might effect their treatment of Daniel. Coworker, then. True. Walking out for drink after work. Was mugged. Daniel was maced in the face. That could work._

Dan moaned quietly, making him look up quickly. There was a bruise between his eyes now, where the canister had driven the nose piece of the goggles into his skull. The blisters and blotches weren’t as bright red as before. His forehead crinkled, looking pained. Rorschach didn’t want to even consider the possibility of Dan being permanently blind. He wouldn’t let that happen. He might have to bribe or threaten Manhattan to intervene, but if the blue man could dissemble tanks with his mind then he could reassemble damaged eyes or make mechanical ones that worked just as well. Dan might even learn to like that. He could tinker with them. Maybe. 

“No,” Dan said softly. His shoulders jerked. “Not this. Not like this.” He whimpered a bit and Rorschach felt his stomach sink. Dreaming of life as a blind man maybe. A nightmare. For both of them. Rorschach took off his hat and started on the coat. Time to get ready. No reason to let Daniel suffer any longer. Suit coat off. He’d wear one of Daniel’s sweaters over his shirt. Never look as lumpy and harmless as Daniel, but hopefully it would be enough. He took a breath to steel himself and pulled his face off. Dan gasped so suddenly that he almost dropped it in alarm. Had Dan seen him??

No. Dan was still asleep, but thrashing now, trying to get an arm free.

“I’m sorry!” he wailed. “I should’ve listened! My fault, my fault, I’m so sorry!”

“Daniel..” Rorschach had to duck as the arm was wrenched free and swung wildly. “Daniel! Stop!” He caught the wrist and hrrked as he was grabbed by the collar and yanked onto Dan’s chest. Dan’s eyes came open, making him freeze. They started through him, not seeing him. The other arm wrestled loose and grabbed him, pawing at him.

“Daniel!” he barked. “Dreaming! Let go!” 

“Rorschach?” Dan seemed to be coming out of a fog. His head swung and Rorschach could see his eyes trying to focus through the blood patches. “You’re all right?” His hands found Rorschach’s jaw and moved to cup it, fingers splaying out over his cheeks, making him wince. Dan’s thumbs stroked over Rorschach’s eyelashes and he grimaced. 

“Daniel…” There was a definite threat there, but Dan didn’t seem to notice.

“I dreamed you took me to the hospital,” Dan said. “And they took me to surgery and you were arguing that you had to come too, and the surgeon gave in and then I went under.“ Dan was speaking too quickly, and his hands tightened, fingers curling along Rorschach’s cheekbones. “And when I woke up I could see fine, and I was so relieved, but I couldn’t find you. And I was roaming around the hospital for hours, down halls and stairways, and I couldn’t find you! And I passed a mirror and I saw my eyes were blue. Like really bright blue. And I asked how that happened and they said my eyes were ruined and they had to put some organ donor eyes in me. So that scared me and they finally sent me home. And I waited and waited for you to show up and you never did, so that night, I went back, and oh my God, Rorschach, you were in a freezer in the basement and they had taken out your eyes and put them in me. And I was just screaming because I should’ve listened and I didn’t and I’d rather be blind….” His voice trailed off and he pulled Rorschach into a hug, ignoring the squeak. 

Their noses were touching and Dan’s fingers fanned out on either side of Rorschach’s face, stroking the stubble, tracing the sharp angles, and trying to smooth the grim line of his mouth. 

“I don’t know why I thought your eyes might be blue,” he said, more quietly. “…Are they?” 

“Doesn’t matter.” Those two words were forced out through teeth he could feel clench under his hands. “Mask doesn’t matter.”

“Well…” Dan seemed to be getting a hold of himself again, and had made no move to let go of Rorschach. “If I hadn’t been so scared for you, I would’ve thought they were beautiful.” 

Rorschach growled something and began to struggle. Dan wrapped arms tight around him, almost nuzzling into his cheek. 

“Ennk. Let go! Still can’t see. Take you to hospital now. “

“I don’t want to go now,” Dan said. “I’d rather you took care of me. I trust you.”

“Daniel…”

“I can see shapes moving in the dark now,” he said. “No light, no color, but when you move, I can sort of see a blur. And it’s not burning as badly. Just kind of prickling.”

“It was just a dream, Daniel. Stress and pain medication.”

“I know. Still. Not yet. I’ll wait until tomorrow.”

“Let me up.”

“Not yet.”


	3. Chapter 3

They were quiet for a long time after that. Every now and then, Dan would feel Rorschach shift, but he didn’t try to pull away, which was remarkable enough in itself. Dan hadn’t expected him to tolerate being petted this way, certainly hadn’t expected the little sigh against his hands. He couldn’t tell if it was a resigned sigh or something more content. It wasn’t a growl and he hadn’t been hit yet, so he took it as encouragement.

His fingers roamed lightly, as if Rorschach wouldn’t notice. Dan would never be able to recognize him after just touching his face, but couldn't help trying to piece the little hints together. The face under his hands was all sharp angles. Even the lips felt rough and unloved, which made him wince as soon as he thought it. The mask always smoothed his features out, but without it, Dan could feel the hard edges, the prickle of two days worth of stubble. Nothing soft or sleek under the latex, except for maybe the eyelids. 

Dan kept returning to them, stroking his thumbs over as gently as he could and still feel the trembling eye underneath and the brush of short, thick eyelashes. The horror of his dream still lingered, but it had lost its chill. Rorschach was warm and alive and his eyes were where they belonged. And even more miraculous, he was sprawled halfway across Dan with his head resting on Dan’s collar, allowing himself to be fondled like a house pet. Only the fact that he couldn’t see it kept Dan from thinking he was still dreaming. 

He still wanted to know what color Rorschach’s eyes were. In the dream, they had been blue, cold and bright as winter. They had stood out like headlights in his own face in the dream mirror, beautiful but wrong. He couldn’t help but want to see them in Rorschach’s face. Rorschach was right about it not mattering. It didn’t matter if they weren’t really blue, but Dan still wanted to see them. He strained to see something past the blurs of black and white. 

It was surreal. He knew the mask was off. He had his hands on the bare face, could feel the breath on his own face, but all he could still see was shifting light and dark. Then he heard the faint snore. 

“Are you asleep?” he asked, surprised and pleased all over again that Rorschach had dropped so much of his guard.

“No,” the answer was immediate, but came with a slight jerk that made Dan think it was a lie. 

“Just checking,” he said and he heard a grumble, felt the dry lips brush his hands, then the angular face burrowed into his neck. Dan tensed, even as the body against his relaxed. Rorschach’s breathing hitched once, then went deep and slow as he sank deeper into sleep. Dan couldn’t believe it, but then realized that Rorschach had probably been awake for at least a day and a half, on patrol and watching over him. Poor guy was probably exhausted. 

And hungry, he mentally added as a belly gurgle, even fainter than the snore, came from somewhere in between them. If he could see, he could slip downstairs and make them both some food, but he couldn’t and he wasn’t especially eager to leave this admittedly bizarre comfort anyway. He let one hand curl around Rorschach’s jaw, just to cradle it against his shoulder more comfortably and slid the other down Rorschach’s back. He could feel his spine through the shirt. 

“No.” It was just a mutter against his skin. Dan stopped rubbing.

“Sorry,” he whispered, just in case Rorschach was awake enough to hear him. There was another sound, a low groan, and Rorschach’s hand clutched at him, fingernails digging into his chest. 

“Ow. Easy.” Dan shifted a bit. “What are you dreaming about, buddy?” The movement had moved Rorschach’s hips enough that Dan could feel an obvious erection pressing against his leg. Oh. The fingers tightened again, and hips ground against his thigh once. Rorschach whined softly, shivering with the strain of keeping still. His breath caught in Dan’s ear and whispered “No.” again. 

Dan was frozen, paralyzed with embarrassment. All he could hear was his own frantic heartbeat. This couldn’t be happening. He was afraid to move, ashamed for both their sakes. Rorschach would be mortified if he knew what he was doing. He had to stay asleep. Dan was willing to pretend he hadn’t noticed any of this. Whatever else happened, whatever he did, if Dan could just lie lay still and think of England until it was over…

“Daniel…” It was a low needful whisper and the vibration of it sent goosebumps prickling over Dan’s body. Was it possible that Rorschach was dreaming about him? No. No way. Rorschach’s hand slid to touch the hand that Dan still had against his cheek. His head tilted into Dan’s palm with a helpless sound and he rubbed himself against Dan’s leg in rough, fast jerks. Almost immediately, his whole body locked again and even in dreams, he shook with the effort of restraint. 

“Rorschach?” Dan asked timidly. He couldn’t see what was going on, but couldn’t imagine that Rorschach was awake. He had to just be having some weird, stimulating dream. He had no idea where the next touch would come from, no idea how to get away without waking his partner and have to explain he was trying to dodge his sleep-humping. There was no way that would go over well. 

Teeth sank into his thumb, the unexpected pain making him yelp in spite of himself. The teeth were replaced by a tongue, lapping gently at the bite as if to soothe it. It sent a jolt all the way through Dan and pooled in his belly sending unwelcome heat trickling lower. Another pump of Rorschach’s hips against him only made it worse. 

“Oh my God,” he whispered. This couldn’t be happening. Rorschach was going to kill him. Nervousness and self-consciousness had always killed his arousal before he could take advantage of it before this. Why was it that being blind, naked, and helpless and thrust at by a person who would strangle him for this wasn’t? He whimpered as wet suction pulled on his thumb and sent a throb into deeper places. The next sucking kiss landed on his neck, making him jump.

“We can’t do this,” he gasped. “You’ll kill me when you wake up.” He was only dimly aware of struggling. There were hands in his hair and teeth pulling at his bottom lip. Fingernails dragged from his jaw down his throat, over his chest and ribs and belly, the joint tucking under to let the knuckles rub over softer flesh farther down. Dan felt his back arch to press against it. 

“Want this too,” Rorschach’s voice came from the blurs in front of his face. He was close enough that his breath puffed against Dan’s face and there was crack in his voice, like it was more than he had ever hoped for. “You do…” The kiss was clumsy and desperate and Dan let himself groan into it before he pulled away.

“Please be awake,” he gasped. “Rorschach? Can you hear me?” He felt the body against his stop moving, felt his own arousal throb against Rorschach’s. There was silence except for both their breathing and the blurs in front of his face were still. He wished to God he could see whatever expression was on his partner’s face, even though he was halfway terrified just imagining it. Anything was better than not knowing, just squinting into space. He kept his grip on Rorschach’s wrist, just in case he bolted. 

“Say something,” he begged. “Bad enough to be blind without being deaf.“ He heard a hard exhale, felt the breath against his skin. Rorschach started to tremble. Dan felt the arm under his hand tighten and knew there was a fist somewhere in his future. “ I just wanted to be sure that you were awake,” he said, and when still no response came, added a bit shakily. “If you’re going to hit me, give me some warning first.”

“Didn’t try to stop me.” It was a growl usually reserved for criminals. While it sandpapered over his senses, Dan tried to decide if it was an accusation or not. He couldn’t tell, but Rorschach’s body leaned forward instead of away. Dan was changing his mind about wanting to see his expression. He felt intimidated without even seeing it.

“I thought you were asleep,” he whispered. “I knew you wouldn’t … do that. If you were awake. Wasn’t fair to let you… Whoever you were dreaming about, you wouldn’t want to wake up to me.” There was another long silence where Dan braced for the punch. Would it be in his face, or his stomach? A groin hit would be appropriate, but they were still pressed too close for that. The pale blurs were becoming slowly human shaped, he noticed. That was good, assuming he lived long enough to appreciate it. 

“Didn’t,” the growl held a breathless note now. “Want to take advantage.”

“I’m sorry,” Dan felt a new wave of helplessness. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Responded.” The pale face blur leaned in close, so close that there were slightly less pale blurs of his eyes visible. Shaking fingers touched his face and he flinched despite the fact that the touch was a thousand times gentler than he had expected. “Wanted it.”

“I… yes.” No sense in denying it now.

“Wanted me…” That delirious creak in Rorschach’s voice was back, as if this was something more miraculous than he had ever dreamed. He was harder than ever and his breathing had sped up again. 

“Yes.” Dan peered upwards, hoping to see a flicker of color after all. Any other explanation was smothered in another kiss, this one pinning Dan’s lip between sets of teeth. It felt like it was bleeding, but he couldn’t taste anything over the warm intensity of Rorschach’s mouth. Maybe the color of blood would get through the haze.

His hands went back to Rorschach’s face to change the angle of the kiss. As much as he half-expected to be bitten, he wanted it deeper and more. Rorschach’s hands were everywhere, tracing his body, like he was trying to shape Dan out of the dark blur he was blind in. Fingernails scraped over Dan’s chest and slid to dig into his bicep. Another hand slid between them, catching and stroking. Dan arched and whined, burying his face in Rorschach’s neck. 

“Dreamed of this.” Rorschach rasped into his ear. “Dreamed of you… Had to hide it. Should’ve been safe with you blind. Should‘ve -nnnghh.” His voice was dragged away from vowels when Dan rolled him onto his back and ground against him. 

“How was I supposed to ignore this?” he asked, need taking all the indignation out of his voice. A hand latched on to the back of his neck, pulling his head down enough for teeth to fasten into his neck. He gasped and wrapped an arm around Rorschachto keep him close. The friction between them made them clutch desperately at each other as the rest of their bodies took over. The rest of Dan’s explanation was squeezed into frenzied little sounds. He couldn’t talk or think or even try to see. The dark haze was turning white at the edges. 

He was felt Rorschach jerk and heard his name gasped. Dan squeezed him close and tight as he came, wanting to feel every tremor and pant for breath. Rorschach spasmed hard, choking back his cries as if he was ashamed of them. It only made his convulsions more intense and Dan felt a surge he couldn’t have controlled if he had wanted to. It tore through him, left him shaking and sobbing his partner’s name, crushing them both into the tangled sheets. 

Everything was dark for a long time after that. Once they had recovered, the gravity of the situation sank in. Rorschach was actually reasonable about it before dozing off. Maybe it was Dan’s blindness that sugarcoated the insanity of what had happened, a desperate ‘see-no-evil-so-it-must-not-exist’ rationalization that probably wouldn’t hold much water once he had rested and had to face the world again. If that was the case though, Dan wasn’t going to tell him that his pale blur was now smoother around the edges and topped with red. In fact, Dan was hoping that if he was patient and didn’t let on right away, he might get to see Rorschach’s eyes when they opened.


End file.
